Love is... thanks very much

Sometimes I am not very good at expressing how grateful I am for the things that I have. I should do this more often. I know it's Thanksgiving and I hate being cliche... but at the same time, I shouldn't pass the chance to express my gratitude for some of the key things in my life.

First, my sweet husband. Guys, he's perfect for me. You may not believe in soul mates, but he makes me believe. I am grateful for his talent and his hard working personality. I'm grateful for his job and that he excels at his job. I am grateful for the time and effort he is willing to put into school. Most of all, I am grateful for the strong testimony he has.

My little son! He is amazing. He teaches me something new every day. One of my favorite patients at work is a Patriarch and I had the opportunity to introduce Jude to him. He told me that Jude was a strong spirit.. and he really is.

My parents. They're great. If they weren't as patient as they are, I would have never come out of my middle school years alive.

My brother. Besides the fact that basically everything that comes out of his mouth is outrageously funny, he also happens to be intelligent and wise.

My in-laws. All those rumors about your in-laws being crazy are NOT true... in my case anyway. Mike and Kris provide Tyler and I with so much. They are always there to listen and give help and advice. They are extremely generous and just amazing people. My brothers and sisters in law are awesome too and are so willing to lend advice and time and talents to help Tyler and me. I pretty much texted Cari everyday asking for pregnancy advice.

My grandparents. Every single one of them has helped me in one way or another throughout my life. I am ever so blessed to have had them live for a large portion of my life, lending advice and caring like they have.

I have AWESOME AMAZING BEAUTIFUL WONDERFUL TALENTED SPIRITUAL FRIENDS! Jeff

Whitney and James - I mean, what kids their age are assigned to build a temple?!

Emlen - she checked up on me and Jude all the time.

Emma and Isaac Westwood

Kalie and Spencer Demann

Amelia, my dear work friend

Natalie, basically my sister throughout high school and college

EVERYONE IS AMAZING. I could talk about all of these people forever.

My cousin Jenny. Holy cow, she saved our lives with her amazing baby schedule. She has always been so willing to lend me advice and I would be crazy to ignore anything someone this talented says.

My job. Guys, I just love my job. My boss is amazing. He has definitely taught me so many things, not only about medicine but also about being a good person.

Our home

Our freedom

Our opportunity to learn and grow

books

music - and the immortal genius of Dave Matthews

College sports

The church. Where would I be without the Lord? I would have none of the above, that is for sure. I love the gospel with all my heart.

Love is...Conversing

Last night I was having a very difficult time falling asleep. Mostly, this is bad but on some lucky occasions it gives me the chance to laugh because Tyler has a horribly bad habit of talking in his sleep. Actually, talking really isn't the best way to describe what goes on. Conversing is better. And let me be the first to tell you, this guy has some wacky dreams. Last night was no exception.

Ty sits straight up and stares at the door to our bedroom for 15-20 seconds. Kat puts down her book...

Kat: Ty. What's wrong?

Ty: They just can't find their way out.

Kat: Who can't find their way out?

Ty: I can't remember... I can't remember their names! They work at Fastenal... they test the guns. I can't remember their names but they test the guns and make sure everything works for the missions.

Kat: Okay. Well I'm pretty sure you should go back to sleep.

Tyler is already back to sleep.

This tells me three things are currently occupying Tylers mind:

1. People getting into his house.

2. Work.

3. Call of Duty.

Love is... Um, thanks

Today at work, a co-worker phoned and asked me a question. I responded and she (or he... but really, a boy wouldn't say this) said "Kat you are like always so happy on the phone. You must just have the easiest life to be this happy all the time" Um... thanks? I think that was a compliment. Granted, this is also the girl (or guy) who told me, 3 weeks after I had Jude, "You look really good! You only have a little bit of a belly left". I think she means well? I'll go ahead and give her the benefit of the doubt.
Moral of this short story?
Yes. I am quite happy. I don't mean to turn this into a brag blog but I have the cutest baby, I'm married to the most handsome man, I scored with awesome in laws, my parents rock, my little brother makes me laugh every day, I have an awesome house, and amazing friends. However, I would just like to clarify that in my personal "quest for perfection (did you like that BYU reference?) I have encountered some bumpy terrain. I have had sad things happen to me, I've loved and lost, I've had friends and recently family die... things are rough sometimes. Just because I don't talk about my problems or cry in public settings, doesn't mean that haven't experienced sad things in life.

Secondly: This kid won first prize in the Halloween costume party


Thirdly: I love these socks. Will someone either make them for me or teach me how to make them or find a not so expensive version of them for me?


Lastly: It has been far too long since I've blogged about Dave Matthews... so without further ado... DAVE

Love is... spare time

I just spent the last hour or so of my life watching Harry Potter while reading Harry Potter facts online. I LOVE Harry Potter. I cannot wait for Tyler to take me to Harry Potter world (hint HINT).

I have also spent the last little while watching 24 on Netflix. It has become a love/hate relationship. I love it because it gives me something to do while feeding Jude but oh, how I hate it. My mind has become a bowl of mush. How can one man accomplish SO much in just 24 hours, after no sleep, and being gruesomely tortured? I don't understand. Even worse, is there are so many story lines, and just when you think you know a guy - they end up breaking your heart and your only on hour 13... how could things get any worse for Jack? It's awful. Then, when you finally make it to hour 23 and you can feel the final resolution coming... the Russians get involved and the President gets attacked and his ex wife is back so you have to start the next 24 hours. It's too much. But I CAN'T STOP.

On a more pleasant note - I had the most delicious meal last week. My sister in law Cari had me over to her house and she made ginger peach salmon... um, hello! I have been craving it ever since. I need to get the recipe from her and share it with all of you because you will probably die of happiness.

Another thing that has been filling my days since Jude was born is a sweet exercising DVD! Tracy Anderson kicks my trash! Tyler even tried it out with me once. When he had to stop to hold Jude, he stuck around and was a personal trainer, yelling "You're a champion, you're a champion!" Here's a little taste of what it probably looks like when I'm doing my exercises

Love is... CRISIS

I had a HUGE personal crisis. Literally, probably a grapefruit sized crisis. Yesterday, when Jude finally decided have a little shut eye, I got to work and started cleaning the house. I probably would have had every surface so shiny to the point that you could see your reflection in it... but then my personal crisis happened. I went to make the bed and I pulled back the covers on my side and there it was, summoned from the depths of my own personal hell, a GIANT GRAPEFRUIT sized spider carcass curled into a nasty little ball of death. I screamed, I cried, I hyperventilated, and I cried some more. Then I phoned Tyler and cried to him. This is a huge deal. I'm not being stupid or girly when I tell you that I am petrified of spiders. If I was on Fear Factor and I had to hold a spider for a million dollars, I would walk away so fast it would make your head spin. Also, I had to ask myself the burning question... did I sleep with this spider? Am I the cause of its death? Did my legs crush it during the night? Answer - probably. Sick. So now not only was I touched by a spider, but I unsuspectingly found it while cleaning (which gave me a fright) AND I have officially slept with another man besides Tyler.

So I am standing there, talking to Tyler about this awful experience and like a good husband he is trying to calm me down and BAM! My personal hell is NOT dead and the spider unfolds his nasty little legs and comes to life. So now that his legs are unfolded he is the size of approximately a grapefruit plus a small apple. I screamed and started crying again and ran into the bathroom. So now I am cornered. I can't leave the bathroom because then I would have to walk past the spider and I can't do that. I asked Tyler to come home and kill the spider. He said he would but I would have to sit there and make sure the stupid thing didn't get away and I wasn't going to sit there for that long. So I phoned my dad. He didn't think I was serious in the beginning, but this wasn't my first rodeo so it didn't take too long to convince him that I was 100% serious. So, like any loving father would do he got into his car and headed out. In order to distract myself I decided to take a shower. I left the curtain open and the door open so I could watch the creeper just in case he started to make a run for it... although, it's not like I would do anything about it. Just as I was getting out of the shower, Jude started to cry. Perfect, so now I had to make the decision... it was like Sophies choice almost. I phoned Tyler and explained my situation. He coached me for 5-10 minutes until he convinced me to run to Judes room and promised the spider wouldn't jump on me. I screamed and ran and made it. My dad got there and killed the stupid thing and checked all the baseboards and made sure no more spiders were lurking in my room. Then he told me that I should consider counseling.

I get that to most people, a spider is childs play. But to me... I can't do it. I don't do spiders. I literally get petrified. My knees don't bend. And one run in with a spider causes me weeks of fear and anxiety. Any shadow, any falling leaf, it's a spider and I am minutes away from some form of torturous death.

Moral of the story - this is why God gave me a son first. Because at the ripe age of three he is going to be killing every spider he sees so his mom can live a long and happy life.

Love is... my little son

My little son is not so little anymore. I woke up this morning to a text from Tyler informing me that he is 3 weeks old today! Where did the time go? He is becoming a bigger boy and does something new and surprising every day. He sneezes just like his dad and hiccups just like his mom. He loves his little head covered and likes to watch the lights when we drive at night. He has a little bit of an attitude when he doesn't think the service is up to par... I think he gets that from his dad too.

This is his little drunk face... he gets this when he has had the perfect amount of milk at just the right temperature

PRECIOUS

First bath... not so well. He loved the second one though.

Cougars first encounter. My little dog and my little son get along very well. Cougar is very protective although he does get slightly jealous when Tyler and I don't pay attention to him

Love is... Hey Jude

Tyler and I have a baby. His name was once Festus. Now it is Jude. Officially Jude Edward Atticus Morrow.

Jude - because I love the Beatles. Yes. He is named after the song 'Hey Jude'

Edward - That's my grandpas name. He is a wonderful man. My grandma Maxine (these are my dads parents) got really sick a long time ago with a lot of things, but worst of all, dementia. A long time ago meaning at least 6-7 years ago. He loved her so much that he wouldn't put her in a home because he couldn't stand to loose her. So day in and day out my aunt Lori and him took care of her. He changed her and fought with her to take her meds and fed her and loved her every day. What a remarkable man. She just recently passed away this August.

Atticus - my favorite hero from any book. Atticus Finch from 'To Kill a Mockingbird' kicks trash!

I won't lie though... sometimes Ty and I still call him Festus. Or the stoos. Poor kid.

Having a baby is wonderful. Stressful, but wonderful. Sometimes I cry because I don't know why he is crying but then it is all okay because I get to watch him sleep and he makes the cutest faces.

Tyler and I went to the doctor Thursday September 8th and I had a plan. I just wanted to see how far along I was and then I was going to let Dr. Watts that this was going to be a natural birth because I am a self proclaimed hippie and natural is the way I have always dreamed of having a baby. When he came in he let me know I was at a 4. He gave me the option of being induced or waiting. All at once my mind switched gears and I jumped all over being induced. Really, I have no idea why. I said how about tomorrow and he laughed and said how about Monday. So Monday it was. We phoned the hospital Monday morning and they told us to be there at 7:45. So we showed up, got checked in, and Dr. Watts broke my water and started me on pitocin. I remember the first two hours and the contractions and thinking to myself "this is a freaking cake walk. I can totally do this". Then come noon and I was ready to kill someone. I could not take the pain anymore and... I caved. Poor Tyler tried everything to help me through it but I just could take it. They gave me the epidural when I was at a seven and in 20 minutes I went from a 7-10. Dr. Watts was paged and we were ready to have a baby! While we were waiting for Dr. Watts, Judes heart-rate tanked. They tried moving me around and giving me oxygen but nothing was helping. When Dr. Watts got there we discovered that the cord was wrapped around his neck too tightly for Dr. Watts to loosen with his fingers. He let me know that I could try pushing a few times but if I wasn't making any progress then he would have to try using the forceps. I pushed but no success, so the forceps were brought in and just like that Jude arrived. I didn't realize it then but people from the NICU were in the room and they immediately took Jude to make sure he was okay. The cord was wrapped around his neck and his body pretty tight but they were able to cut it and he was PERFECT! No NICU for my little guy. I ended up needing 20 stitches to fix the damage done by the forceps. After everything had calmed down and everyone left us, my nurse (who rocked!) came back in with some percocet. I initially declined because I didn't want to be drugged with my baby but then she said "trust me, I saw what he did to your vagina... you want the percocet". My little Jude is literally the most beautiful baby on this earth and he was SO chill. He stayed awake, just looking around at everything for hours and hours after he was born.

He had so many visitors and the generosity shown by people was truly overwhelming. We received so many gifts and people were just awesome. We had great nurses and the experience was just awesome.

Now, I may be justifying or making myself feel better about taking the epidural but I kind of feel like Heavenly Father played a little bit of a part in the whole process. Had I not been induced, I would have waited longer and he would have had the cord wrapped around him for longer as he got bigger. Had I not had the epidural, I would not have been able to relax and progress so fast and I also would have felt all 20 of those stitches and the forceps. Like I said, maybe I'm kidding myself but that is how I feel about it.

So... without further ado, welcome JUDE